A Revised Query Letter

"Here I am, on the road again/ There I am, up on the stage." - "Turn the Page" by Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band

The road is the submissions process and the stage is my query letter. I am once again getting back into the game, hopefully with better results this time thanks to my newly revised query letter. I have been at this for a while, but I am still growing, still learning, and still working to make the dream come true, so I am posting my query in the hopes of getting some feedback from all of you out there, whether you are writers, working in the literary/publishing field, an avid reader, or just someone who has an opinion to share. I'd love to hear any comments you want to leave me. Thanks for reading, and I hope this letter is a winner. Fingers crossed!

Dear Ms. _______,

I read in Guide to Literary Agents that you specialize in representing new authors, and after looking at your website I feel my 99,000 word novel, Secrets, would be a good match for you. It is women’s fiction geared toward the twenty to thirty-something crowd.

Seventeen, pregnant, and on her own. This is the position that recent high school graduate Willow Ryan finds herself in during the summer of 1986. Not wanting to disappoint her family or ruin the father’s life, Willow leaves Indiana for charming Santa Elena, California, determined to raise her child on her own without telling a soul back home. She lands a job working for Peggy Maguire, a former Southern Belle with a knack for finding trouble - and humor - in the most unlikely places. Willow’s new neighbor, a friendly surfer dude named Denny, quickly becomes someone she can count on for anything, but could there be more to their relationship than Willow sees? Get ready to laugh out loud and a shed a tear or two as Secrets takes you on a journey that begins with an independent young woman trying her best to hide the truth, and ends with a pivotal event that turns her world upside down, forcing all of Willow’s secrets to come to light.

Although I definitely have my own unique style and voice, Secrets could be described as a combination of Kristin Hannah’s sincere emotion, Meg Cabot’s humor, and the welcoming tone of a Robin Jones Gunn novel, where the characters seem like old friends stopping by with an invitation to a beach party or to offer a much needed hug. I chose to write this book because Willow’s character has a story to tell, and many women will relate to her as she gives all she has to create the best possible life for her child.

This is a simultaneous submission, and my completed manuscript is ready to be sent at your request. While Secrets can definitely stand on its own, it is also the first novel in a series. I have completed the next three books and have plans for a fifth Willow Ryan novel as well. I have enclosed the first ten pages of Secrets for you to read as stated on your website. Thank you so much for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Shannon Higgins